tanvi's digital journal

November 1, 2025

I’m ashamed that I just let this blog to wither away into oblivion. I let the humdrum of adulthood replace the childlike curiosity with which I created this. It’s been a long time since I last experienced the joy of racking my brain to write something, and there’s no one else but myself to blame for that. I can’t think of a single topic that’s worth writing about. But it’s my birthday month, and I think the best gift I could give myself is the challenge of at least trying. So, here I am. Happy November 🙂

Monday, September 29, 2025

To the anonymous “long-time reader” who messaged me today: I pray that you are blessed with everything your kind heart desires, for your words have breathed joy into a heart that was slowly withering in monotony. Thank you.

Friday, August 22, 2025

I am convinced that there is a 99% chance of your plans failing if you share them with others before you execute them, or are in the process of executing them. My scientific-minded friends will say it’s because of a premature dopamine rush. People like me will say it’s because of ‘nazar.’ But whatever the reason is, scientific or otherwise, it’s true. We got to learn how to shut up and do what we’re supposed to.

Saturday, August 16, 2025

A harsh lesson life has repeatedly taught me is to not be too expressive about your vulnerabilities with others. Even in your closest relationships. Even if the other person means well. This does not mean that you become a robot and always pretend like everything is good. Be honest about your weaknesses, but reserve your deepest, most poignant feelings for God alone.

Friday, August 15, 2025

Oh, what a blessing it is to be a native of the sacred land of Bharat. Happy Independence Day!

Saturday, August 09, 2025

Time and again I have to remind myself to not take what I read on social media too seriously. There are more preachers than practitioners online. Sometimes the person with the most “inspirational” social media profile has done absolutely messed up stuff in their personal life. The one who gives feel-good relationship is advice is probably unmarried (“Dating” does not count, I’m sorry). The one who talks about the futility of materialistic desires probably lives in a bungalow and has a luxury car.

Note to self: Your life is yours. Think for yourself. Don’t let the words of strangers (many of them who are faceless) dictate your actions.

Tuesday, August 05, 2025

Sometimes it’s very freeing to think about how you’re just a nobody in the larger scheme of things.

Monday, August 04, 2025

Starting the week with this brutal reminder:

Wednesday, July 31, 2025

The unexplained excitement that we feel at the start of something new — a new project, a new month, a new person to talk to — is life’s way of reminding us that there is always something to look forward to.

Goodbye July, and welcome August 🙂

Sunday, July 27, 2025

I think the good thing about the collective frustration with AI-generated slop is the gradual shift towards appreciating authentic human skills and talents. The ‘human touch’ is usually manifested through things that you can see, hear touch, or feel — things like timeless classics, cultural handicrafts, historical sculptures, and so on.

Wednesday, July 23, 2025

Been super inconsistent with writing for a few weeks now, and I feel like I’m slowly losing myself. I’ve come to realize that if I do not express myself through words for a prolonged period of time, I begin to fall apart. I’ve now been forcing myself to write something, literally anything, on a piece of paper everyday. It’s agonizing because I just can’t seem to find the right words within me anymore. For instance, it’s taken me almost 15 minutes to write this ineffectual paragraph. Is this what they call a writer’s block?

Sunday, July 20, 2025

Today I realized that being sophisticated is not the same as being cultured. I know a bunch of highly educated and suave people who refuse to touch the feet of elders because it’s ‘oppressive.’ Sophistication is just an outward display. A person’s true character is a reflection of his cultural upbringing.

Thursday, July 17, 2025

I’ve been reading online content across SM platforms since high school. There was a time when every alternate article or post would be well-researched, well-written, and insightful. Nowadays it’s hard to come across something that’s novel, something that stirs your mind. If you scroll for > 10 minutes on any platform, everything starts to sound the same. I don’t know if it’s a quality decline problem, or a content oversaturation problem, or both.

Monday, July 14, 2025

Stop writing for a while, and your words will leave you. Stop exercising, and your energy will fade. Stop talking to someone, and your feelings will begin to slip away. Staying in touch, whether with an activity or a person, is how you keep it alive, how you help it grow.

Wednesday, July 09, 2025

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” (The Serenity Prayer)

Monday, July 07, 2025

Just because something is common, does not mean that it’s normal. I realized this after I spoke to someone who was unbothered after being diagnosed with PCOS, because “so many girls have it these days, it’s not a big deal.” Not getting your periods for months on end is NOT how a healthy woman’s body is supposed to function. Just because something is prevalent, does not mean that it’s okay, or normal, or correct.

Friday, July 04, 2025

I’ve been finding it excruciatingly difficult to write, or even journal, lately. Perhaps a reflection of a scattered mind. It’s frustrating, but I’m trying hold on to whatever little enthusiasm there still is, hoping that this phase passes soon.

Wednesday, July 02, 2025

Did something I shouldn’t have done today. Told my mom about it. She said I should be grateful that God gave me the wisdom, at the right time, to recognize and accept that what I did was wrong.

Sometimes, emotions like guilt and regret serve a purpose: they ground us. They remind us that we’re not perfect, and that there’s always room to grow.

Monday, June 30, 2025

Same

Sunday, June 29, 2025

Being flexible is good – you become more adaptable and are willing to make compromises if things aren’t going your way. But at some point, you have to define your ‘boundaries’, ‘non-negotiables’, ‘hard-and-fast rules’ or whatever you want to call them. If you keep saying yes to things you don’t want / want to do, or keep settling for people whose company you don’t really desire, you start to lose yourself.

Saturday, June 28, 2025

For non-coders, vibe coding is fun until things get complex. I’m talking stuff like cloud storage, authentication, custom deployment. I’ve tried vibe coding myself as a non-coder and could only get so far. The best vibe coders will be those who have a strong foundation in non-vibe, proper coding.

Friday, June 27, 2025

There is something deeply captivating about Lord Jagannath. Something in that broad smile and those big, round eyes that make you want to keep looking at Him. You will find traces of Him everywhere in Odisha: painted on shop shutters, printed on T-shirts, pasted on car windshields, echoed in greetings that skip “Hello” for “Jai Jagannath.” The very pulse of Odisha reverberates with His name. People there are crazy about Him, and you will understand why only once you catch a live glimpse of Him. He is, after all, the Lord of the Universe. Jai Jagannath. ❤

Wednesday, June 25, 2025

I feel strongly and deeply. It can be blissful at times, perilous at others. I’ve often tried to “control” my emotions, to think more “rationally,” but it hasn’t taken me very far. No amount of feigned nonchalance or borrowed Stoicism can dull the intensity of my emotions. And I’ve come to realize that it’s okay.

What’s the point if you can’t feel the butterflies of attraction or the ache of separation? If your heart doesn’t race before a presentation? If every cell of your being isn’t dancing with joy when you’re laughing from your belly? If you can’t feel the lightness that follows a good cry? What’s the point?

Monday, June 23, 2025

One of those days when an unspoken heaviness settles in the chest like mud in water. Though uncomfortable, these are the moments that reveal the tenderness of the heart. Sit with it, breathe through it, cry it out if needed. But feel it—experience it, revel in it—through and through.

Sunday, June 22, 2025

One thing I’ve been consciously practicing this year is to not rush through things. It’s working wonders.

Most things are not as urgent as we think. When we’re always hurrying, our minds are everywhere but present. But the present is all that there is. Practice presence.

Saturday, June 21, 2025

Sometimes, what you like is at odds with what is good for you. In such situations, you should always choose what is good for you, even if you don’t necessarily like it.

But the more important thing is to first figure out what is good for you.

Friday, June 20, 2025

Wednesday, June 18, 2025

“Being yourself” essentially means forgetting yourself. When you are truly being yourself, you’re not conscious of yourself. There are no doubts or insecurities. You don’t think of what others think of you. You’re just… being. Not performing. Not trying to impress. Not fighting with yourself. Just being. You.

Monday, June 16, 2025

The most beautiful people are those who smile/laugh from the heart.

Sunday, June 15, 2025

I am someone who tends to take things personally and feel guilty easily. Every time I get into this state of my mind, I remind myself that nobody is thinking about me as much as I think they do. It helps.

I also ask myself if there’s something I can do to feel better. Did I say something I shouldn’t have said? Be honest and apologize. If that makes things awkward (sometimes the other person may not be that close to you), say or do something nice for the person later. And if that isn’t possible either, just take it as a lesson and don’t repeat the same.

The point is – don’t get stuck in the memories of events you can’t undo. Life goes on, you should too.

Saturday, June 14, 2025

Friday, June 13, 2025

As long as the sun rises, there is hope

Wednesday, June 11, 2025

There are many children in this world who have never experienced the warmth of sleeping on a mother’s bosom, and/or the joy of being carried in the strong yet gentle hands of a father.

If you got to experience these as a child, take some time out everyday to thank God, no matter how difficult life gets. You are beyond blessed if you were born to loving parents.

Tuesday, June 10, 2025

I’ve often wondered what my ‘calling’ in life is. Today, I got my answer from Pinterest:

Monday, June 09, 2025

I’ve been thinking of the people who make my heart bloom. People who allow me the luxury to be aloof and weird. People who make me feel good. People who make life feel good.

They’re not perfect people. They’re just beautifully ordinary people who have given me the the space to be… me. They may not verbally say that they love me, but they make me feel loved. And that’s what matters. Making the people around you feel seen, cherished, and worthy.

When you feel loved, you feel beautiful. And when you feel beautiful, you begin to see beauty everywhere—in others, in the world, in all of God’s creations.

Out of all the things I want to be in life, being a source of love is primary. Because I believe it is the duty of people to pass on the love that they’ve been so very fortunate to receive.

Sunday, June 08, 2025

Sometimes you just got to do things even if there’s no evident “ROI” to it. Do things even they’re tedious and menial. Do things even if you don’t want to, but have to. More of than not, the time you spend resisting doing those things is longer than the actual time it takes to complete them. “Eat the frog,” as they say.

Saturday, June 07, 2025

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you know how someone is by just looking at their social media profile(s). There is a lot more to a person than their feed or bio.

Friday, June 06, 2025

It is deeply frustrating when you can’t find the right words to convey exactly what you think. You re-write a sentence more than a dozen times and you’re still not there. Makes you want to bang your head against the wall.

But, when you finally manage to write the sentence in a way that satisfies your mind, you feel lighter, almost blissful. This feeling is unparalleled, and rightly deserved for not giving up, or giving in to easier or quicker ways.

Even if the world does not appreciate your effort, your soul will.

Thursday, June 05, 2025

Wednesday, June 04, 2025

Sometimes knowing just the ‘what’ is enough. You don’t always need to understand the ‘why.’

Monday, June 02, 2025

If something has been deeply bothering you for the entire day, it’s better to just sleep over it. A new day presents clarity, opportunity, and hope. Don’t worry.

Saturday, May 31, 2025

Wanting approval/praise/validation from others does not make you timid or inauthentic.(I find people who repeatedly claim that they don’t care about what others think suspicious, but that’s another story.) We just need to decide whose admiration we seek. Once we’re clear on that, other people’s opinions shouldn’t matter then.

If you don’t like drinking or partying, then it should not matter if alcoholics or partygoers mock you or call you boring. Remind yourself that you don’t need to impress them, because they’re not who you want to be. At the same time, it’s equally important to find the people you do respect, whose opinions you value — and behave in ways that they will acknowledge and appreciate.

Friday, May 30, 2025

Humility is one of those traits that can only be sensed. It cannot be performed. It’s not something that you can prove with your appearance, eloquence, or credentials. When you try to act humble for others to notice, it can be felt — viscerally, if not directly.

Thursday, May 29, 2025

Taking offence at remarks made by faceless strangers online is pretty ridiculous if you think about it.

Wednesday, May 28, 2025

There are people who go to the gym to stay healthy, but who also drink heavily. People who think they’re independent because they live alone, but cannot cook for themselves. People who want long-term relationships, but are also into hookups. People with spotless clothes but messy wardrobes. People who say they are “spiritual,” but disregard the traditions that have kept this spirituality alive for millennia.

Humans really are walking paradoxes.

Monday, May 26, 2025

Be very careful about passing judgements on people you have no personal association with, or events you are not directly involved in. It takes nothing for the tables to turn, for you to find yourself in a situation that you thought you had the authority to comment on — only to realize how little you truly understood.

Sunday, May 25, 2025

Slowly but surely mastering the art of first recognizing, and then politely ignoring, unsolicited opinions and advice.

Saturday, May 24, 2025

It’s a windy Saturday evening. I walked for more than an hour on busy roads while listening to music. I bought a book from a roadside book stall. I just finished a bowl of noodles. My house is silent but I can hear faint music and laughter from outside. Grateful for the small joys of life.

Friday, May 23, 2025

You may not mean much to the world, but you may mean the world to someone. Appreciate those who love you.

Thursday, May 22, 2025

Really starting to believe that dancing has spiritual benefits. You don’t need to be good at it to experience it.

Tuesday, May 20, 2025

Something sublime about waking up in the middle of the night and hearing the sound of rain.

Monday, May 19, 2025

>>>> People who think they have the moral authority to dictate how others should be living just because they’ve achieved some amount of success

Sunday, May 18, 2025

Every time I get anxious about the future, I read this quote to pull myself out of the spiral:

(not sure if the Buddha actually said this, but the message is still powerful)

Saturday, May 17, 2025

I cannot take people who post videos of themselves meditating or praying seriously. These activities are meant for you to go inwards and realize the divine power that is bigger and beyond yourself. The moment you hit record, you are performing — you are the focus. This defeats the entire purpose of these activities, which is to get over yourself in the first place.

Friday, May 16, 2025

It is not easy to forget, forgive, or let go of the people who have hurt you and that’s okay, as long as you don’t allow them to diminish your gratitude for the other wonderful and beautiful people in your life.

Thursday, May 15, 2025

It’s all about the small acts of love. The reticent husband who carries a photo of his wife in his wallet. The responsible elder sister who gets all her younger siblings ready for school. The tired father who patiently listens to his daughter babble at the end of a long day. The dutiful wife who will not eat dinner until her husband comes home. Love is when your mother cannot sleep because you’re up studying and when your brother silently transfers money to your bank account when he gets a bonus. Love is in your grandma’s embraces and in your grandpa’s prayers. It is in the hand you grab while crossing the road and in the lips that gently kiss your forehead when you’re crying. Oh, I love love ❤

Wednesday, May 14, 2025

Projection as a defense mechanism is so real. So much of what you don’t like in others is just you not liking parts of yourself.

Tuesday, May 13, 2025

I was doomscrolling one day and came across a mirror selfie of a random stranger with the caption “I could live in these jeans forever” and the first thought that came into my mind was “I don’t need to know this.” Nothing against the person or her jeans, it just hit me how so much of what we see online is meaningless and serves no purpose to us at all.

Monday, May 12, 2025

There is a certain kind of bliss that can be experienced only after a long and tiring day.

Sunday, May 11, 2025

Inner beauty never fades. Inner strength never weakens.

Saturday, May 10, 2025

I violently cringe when I read some of my posts/journals, making me want to delete or tear them out. But I will not do that, because embracing cringe-ness is a sign of growth. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.

Friday, May 09, 2025

Indifference in the time of conflict is not cool.

Thursday, May 08, 2025

You don’t need to show people their place. That’s God’s job. Your job is to put yourself in place.

Wednesday, May 07, 2025

I love my country. I carry the blood of my ancestors who worshipped and protected this land. I have breathed its air, eaten its food, been nurtured and loved by its people. The least I can do is bow my head down to this great civilization that I inherit, and wear my identity as an Indian with my head held high. Jai Hind.

Tuesday, May 06, 2025

I was severely deficient in Vitamin D around 2 years ago. Used to feel exhausted and subdued way too often, but thought it was a mental/emotional problem. I started taking supplements regularly and noticed significant positive changes within a week or two. More people need to get their Vitamin D levels checked.